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Back you go | Go forward, move ahead

...learned from an adult neighbor, not Edward, how heroin is sold and used. The adult neighbor had never used it; but knew how it worked. No hood kids were around at this time, as obvious that kind of discussion would not transpire then.

...learned with the hood kids that gackles will kill birds, decapitate them, and eat the head. Why were we learning this? Cuz one found a headless sparrow body. And the robins I had in a nest up front all had been decapitated. We, wrongly, blamed the raccoons. We discovered it was the gackles when we saw sparrows and a robin dive bombing a gackle across the street in the vacant lot. The grass was tall so we didn't know why, then I saw it had a baby sparrow in front of it. The kids chased the gackle off. The baby sparrow was dead; but still had a head. All deceased birds were given an appropriate burial across the street. Then we asked Mr. Google about what in the world was happening, and learned that. I don't get why the head though.

...learned from Edward, yeah I know, that you're not suppose to drive with a neck brace. I was about the 4th car back from the first light by Save-A-Lot and the light turned green. I don't even think I had taken my foot off the break yet and I see a car behind me approaching when I looked in the rearview, the driver wearing a neck brace and he was not slowing down. Impact. MY neck bore the brunt of it. When I got of my car to look at my back bumper and he had gotten out, he no longer had the neck brace off. I thought that very weird; but didn't question it. My car was fine, his license plate was mangled. I said no harm no foul and I had muscle relaxers for my neck. Away we went and I saw him put the neck brace back on. Uh?? Was telling Eddie about that and he said that you aren't suppose to drive with a neck brace because you can't turn your neck to see. That makes sense!! He had a temporary handicapped parking placard too. Eddie said I should have called the police; but there really wasn't a need. The way he's driving he's gonna cause another wreck like the one that probably put him IN the neck brace!!

...soooo summer projects, aside from what I want to do at home personally, which I'm not listing here; the hood kids have given me a list. They want to put hand prints on my house cuz they saw the hand prints on there already and I told them they were from a [then] little boy. Fine, we'll do hand prints on the house. One wants to make slime. Another wants to learn more magic tricks. There's a request for more math, is that even legal for kids to do over the summer?? They have seeds planted in pots already and check on their progress every day. They want to learn about more flowers around here. I'm suppose to watch Peppa [sic?] Pig with them. And there's lots more and amazingly they're simple and nothing fancy, expensive, or 'shiny'. Hood kids keep it real!!

We had a squirt gun fight earlier in the week. We need more squirt guns as not everyone had one.

WINGFOOT ONE IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!!! Hasn't flown around here yet; but we have had "BLIMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" refresher drills.

Kids can't remember Eddie's name so they call him "popsicle" as he hands them out, one per day. They also like to play with his dogs.

Edward got another cell phone today and whereas I had plans to go to Cuyahoga Valley National Park, that was scuppered to deal with his ignorance. Because he cannot READ THE DIRECTIONS ON THE SCREEN!!! My jaw is still aching from the TMJ flare up that caused me. Of course he said I could have went to the park; but how could I knowing I had to deal with his fucking POS cell phone and his inability to ever learn anything?? Then I get thru the set up screens and called the activation number and it wouldn't work!!! You're on your own, I'm done. Call them on the number in the pamphlet. He goes home, then calls me like 20 minutes later cuz he couldn't find the phone number for the new phone--which was in a text message on the POS. They needed the phone #, so he calls and asks me:

Where's my phone number at?
IT IS IN YOUR MESSAGES.
Where's that?
YOU CANNOT READ THE ICONS? LOOK AT THE FUCKING BOTTOM.
Where it says messages?
I AM GOING TO COME OVER WITH MY SLEDGEHAMMER.
Got it. [click]

Then hours later I was over there and he said it wasn't activated earlier cuz they needed more info--it's some tracfone fuckery, cuz you know going to the ATT store would be too easy. But it was working now. But then, get this, he starts:

They said I could change my [new cell] number.
Okay, but why? It's really easy to remember.
I want it to be my home number.
You want to forward your home number to the cell phone?
No, I want the cell phone to have my home number so when someone calls my house it'll ring at both places.
I'm pretty sure you can't do that. You can forward it though but I'm not teaching you call forwarding.
No, I want my cell to have my home number and have my home number still ring.
For fuck's sake.
They told me I could change my number!
That's totally different than having a cell and landline with the same number.
I don't see why it can't be the same.
They're different kinds of networks for starters.
It makes sense to me.
Of course it does.
Why did they tell me I could change my number?
Cuz you can change your CELL PHONE number!!
I want it to be my home #.
No, it cannot be; but feel free to call the cell phone place and tell them this or whoever you have for your home phone.

::headdesk::

WARNING!

This blog shouldn't be read by anyone! Don't say I didn't warn you!

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